August is upon us, and we all know what that means. New backpacks, new clothes, sharpened pencils, and parents heaving a sigh of relief that children are heading back to school.
But wait… enter 2020, the year of COVID-19, social distancing, and online learning. Parents, including myself, are understandably worried, anxious, and dreading the weeks or months of virtual learning that lie ahead.
I’m a teacher and a mother of three kids, and I will be the first to tell you, it’s not going to be easy. Teachers are going to try their best to meet the needs of your family, but it is a team effort.
Middle school and high school students don’t need hand-holding to get through this, and they don’t need parents to be homeschool teachers- they need support, involvement, encouragement, and trust. Teens’ needs are different from young children, so I’m going to try to lay out a few steps to support your middle school or high school student with online learning.
Establish a routine for online learning
Routine is so important for kids of all ages, adults too. One of the biggest problems that I saw with online learning in the spring was a lack of routine.
I’m not blaming parents, that lack of routine was sometimes from schools and teachers. Schools made a schedule, and remade it, and then remade it again. Let’s face it, teachers were flying blind, and we made a lot of mistakes. BUT, we learned.
A new school year is a chance to start fresh and I know firsthand that teachers all across the state are revamping their online learning to better support students and families. Your student will need to start the school year with a schedule to be set up for success.
Let me be clear, I don’t think you need a fancy, color-coded Pinterest schedule with time built in for virtual museum trips or home art projects- ain’t nobody got time for that, and the purpose is that your child can do this independently. Ideally, your teen should make a schedule, write it down, and submit it to you for revisions.
Let me say that again: your teen should write their own schedule.
This schedule needs to be as simple or as complicated as what each child in your home needs. For some students, that is an hourly schedule with time for each class, but for others, it is a start time and a checklist– make it work for your family.
Here is what should be included- a definite start time (that is 9am in my house), class meeting time, homework time, breaks, independent reading time, and time to make a list for the next day’s work.
Many students still don’t equate online learning with real school, so it needs to feel that way. If they sleep until noon and start on school work at 8pm, they are setting themselves up to fail.
Online school should function like school, that means setting alarms, timers, and routines for success.
Establish conference times with your kids
I started conferencing with each of my kids daily last year during online learning. They would show me what they did that day, what they still had to work on, and any grades or feedback they had received.
Truth time: I could barely keep up with my own work and those conferences fell by the wayside pretty quickly, it just wasn’t realistic for one parent who was also working from home. Good intentions and all that. However, those conferences have to be a priority.
Many students do not feel accountable when they don’t see a teacher in person. They need to regularly talk to someone about their progress in school. I propose that you sit down with your child twice a week, at pre-planned times, and have them talk to you about school that week.
Ask them the following about each class:
- What have you been learning?
- What have you been working on?
- What do you still need to do?
- What questions do you have?
Avoid yes or no questions like “Did you finish your homework?” Those types of questions set kids up to answer quickly without reflection. If they are unable to answer those more detailed questions, they are drowning and they need more help.
Maybe you have a responsible, independent learner, and they only need to conference once a week. Maybe you have a child who struggles in traditional school and is overwhelmed by online school, they may need that daily. But all teens need to check in with an accountability partner.
If this doesn’t work for your family because of multiple children, work schedules, sports, etc, make use of siblings, family friends, or grandparents to do these check-ins through facetime or zoom. These conferences aren’t even really about their answers; the important part is that they pause to think about what they are learning. Process not product.
These conversations will bring meaning to your child’s virtual school experience.
Put the responsibility for learning on your child
Above all, this is THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP! This is it. The big one. This is not elementary school, your child should have ownership of his or her learning.
If they have a question, teach them to email the teacher and copy you. If you, as a parent, feel like you are working too hard to support virtual learning for your child, you probably are.
That doesn’t mean you just leave them to handle it all themselves, they are still kids. Instead, ask yourself, what am I doing that my child could be doing instead, and what skills do they need to learn to accomplish that task?
Focus on those skills: emailing, making lists, checking grades online, making schedules, asking for help, recognizing when they don’t understand and seeking answers. If parents can help with those functional skills, teenagers become the advocates for their own learning, and isn’t that the ultimate goal?
I’m a teacher and I’m a parent, and I’m navigating all this for the first (well, second) time, too. Hopefully, my kids and I can all do a better job this time.
This is going to be tough on everyone, but we can get through it. And maybe, just maybe, our kids can come out more independent, more motivated, and more engaged in their own learning. Parents- we can do this!
About the Author
Kelly Maggard
Kelly Maggard is a middle school teacher and mom to 3 adventurous kids. She and her husband are both native Kentuckians. She loves reading, camping, and any time spent in the sun. She also bakes and decorates custom sugar cookies for any event. You can find Always Bring Cookies on Instagram orwww.alwaysbringcookies.comto see her latest cookie creations!